Gee thanks, body.


They say when you lose weight, the first people that notice are strangers and acquaintances. They don’t see you so often, so when they do, the difference is obvious. Even a few pounds may warrant a “Oh hey. You look good. Have you’ve lost some weight?”

The next people that notice are the close ones. The family and friends who squint and cock their head sideways and notice that something has changed. They point out funny things like your collarbone or how taut your back feels when you hug them. “You’re looking thin.. in the face. Or something.”

The last person who will generally notice? you. You look in the mirror so damn often hoping that some pounds have magically fallen off somewhere, that when they finally do it takes you a while to realise that suddenly your trousers fit differently. And that you lose it in bizarre places.

Take me, for the purposes of this argument. I am a small person. I am 5’2 and what the Scots call ‘ickle’. My highest weight and my lowest are 28lb apart (12.7kg). I generally look sick around the lowest, but look chubby and ‘odd’ around the highest. I suit somewhere in the middle and generally look fairly healthy without being uncomfortable in my clothes or looking gaunt. When you’re this low to the ground, a few pounds can make a visible difference.

But my issues have never really related to the scale. Right now I’m hovering around 3-4lb below my highest weight. But obviously, now a lot of that is muscle, so I look a lot smaller and leaner than I did last time I remember being 10lb lighter. It’s weird. I’m still trying to get lower on the scale, but mainly to fit my clothes better and to just be leaner. It’s weird how I feel pretty good at the moment and I’m so close to tipping the scale at an unhappy place.

And come on. I have always had the tiniest of wrists, bony elbows, bony ankles and bony knees. And where am I really noticing this loss? in these bony, bony places. I feel like I must have been starving myself when I touch my knobbly knees, and most people could probably close their thumb and pinky around my wrists. Body. I want to lose weight from this whole, y’know, torso region.

Dave insists that the rest will catch up and yeah, I believe him. But it’s just weird how this whole thing works. I feel I have a pretty good tap on my body and what works and what doesn’t, but the weight vs. size issue has always been a strange phenomenon.

One thought on “Gee thanks, body.

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